Why I Don't Want President Buhari Dead, A Must Read By Malik Awuzie

I’ve never taken more than a passing interest in Nigerian Politics, I have viewed political activities as comical and humorous and that’s exactly what I intend for this article, because I  honestly and sincerely  wouldn’t want our President  Mr  Buhari to die and you should know why..

Apart from the fact that it’s morally, ethically and religiously reprehensible to wish death on someone, even if he is just a big oxygen thief, we have to be considerate, besides
being a president after all, his demise will be grossly inconvenient for the country and just delay policies that are already in place (I know right? What Policies?)  Lets be clear It is definitely not an overwhelming sense of compassion for this individual that brings this idea, no..  

Its quite the opposite actually, it’s a vengeful and vindictive sense of determination to see the downfall of possibly the most incompetent and inept individual to sit in Aso Rock since its creation and lets not forget this guy was once our president…


I concede that General Buhari was an efficient military administrator, in a time where not a lot of experience or working knowledge of Governance was required, lets face it he had all the criteria that the job required at that time, An innate desire to punish people, an autocratic despotic attitude and  a thick Hausa accent. 


But Mr Buhari’s consistent desire to gain back power at all costs, leading him to run for President  FOUR  (4) (incase you didn’t see that well) .. consecutive times has led him from being one of the most disciplined administrators to run the country and a sterling individual with a good legacy to become the WORST, MOST INEFFICIENT, INCOMPETENT, INEFFECTIVE, DESPISED, INEPT, REVILED, DETESTED, LOATHED, SCORNED, INDIVIDUAL TO EVER SIT IN THIS POSITION, to be clear after living in Nigeria with Buhari, you know that God was merciful to the Egyptians by sending a mere Seven Plagues.


In retrospect you have to understand that this man was not a legitimately elected president by any stretch of the imagination, asides that he already had a reputation as a walking bag of testicles,


the APC Party came out with ludicrous terms like “Change” and “Anti Corruption” but lets be honest this oxygen thief and his entire Ethnic group threatened the lives of everyone!! Remember that? The United States had troops stationed in Ghana JUST INCASE PEOPLE ACTUALLY EXERCISED THEIR VOTING RIGHTS TO VOTE LITERALLY ANYONE EXCEPT BUHARI... remember that?  At that point the APC could have won the election on the slogan “A vote from you is welcome but not entirely necessary”.  Troops were stationed outside your freaking country!!  Incase you recently crawled out of a cave, and you don’t know how Wars start…you’re welcome.  


Why would I wish him dead?  You’ve seen what his people did when he wasn’t even yet president, you’ve seen what herdsmen are doing even while he IS president.. I have no iota of doubt that even if he..right now…as you’re reading this article.. physically.. in full view of everyone.. Ascended into heaven on a cloud of glory…some innocent Christians will still die.  

This man literally came into this country and ruined it worse than any other president in the history of presidents ever!!!, that’s an impressive feat to be honest,  IN A COUNTRY CHARACTERIZED BY BAD LEADERSHIP, THIS MAN HAS MANAGED TO SET THE BAR EVEN HIGHER
 I don’t care who he blames... I am a man of simple evidence, if it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck… it’s definitely not a dragon in disguise.  If everything has fallen apart.

 And keeps getting exponentially worse ever since you entered that position you can’t blame anyone else. This man has literally done to our economy what a 6 foot, 400 pound Silverback gorilla in Heat would do to a Naked Sofia Vergara’s vagina..

 and then we allow him to just die? …Take the easy way out and die! No! I want him to live long enough to see the reputation he built for himself years ago, go down faster than our foreign exchange, I want him to live to see himself mocked and persecuted as the sadistic dimwit that he is.. I want him to be CRUSHED under the weight of his failure and know that his name will ALWAYS be synonymous with bad governance and when he is truly broken …”Then he has our permission to die”

If you might have laughed at this, please realize that we re not being unfair here lets be honest it would take short of a stake through that vampires heart to kill him, the real victim here is really you, you’re getting screwed by the economy for the next two years at least and this guy is chilling somewhere drinking Kunu on the rocks..  

but at least he knows we don’t like him very much, the only person who probably could stand him, you know what he did to her… he delivered the most CHAUVINISTIC, MISOGYNISTIC, SEXIST, SUPERCILIOUS, DISPARAGING , DERISIVE, CONDESCENDING, DEMEANING  AND DEVASTATING INSULT OF INTERNATIONAL PROPORTIONS  In front of the world, inadvertently setting women back decades, and as he uttered those words I could feel the hatred of a thousand suns burn in Aisha’s soul,  I could feel the scorn that heaven hath no fury like in her heart, I could hear the cold hurricane of dryness that sealed  her genitals as she looked at his face, never has anyone been obliterated in so many ways than she did to him in her mind,  so even if we are screwed at least we’re not the only ones ..

and we only have at least 2 more years of this pile of shit, she still has to screw him for the rest of his unnatural life.


The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author and in no way represent that of naijacynth.com