Torkwase Jessica Kuraun Bares It All: My Marriage Consummated In Divine Love Back In 2006 Had Its Tests And Trials, But We Are Now Ten Years Old
Friends, brothers and sisters listen now, I have a story to tell: Who could have believed that a woman that was persistently, but erroneously described as barren, morally bankrupt, bestial and from socially unacceptable background, would now be a social media celebrity and an exemplar of a great wife in one of the most celebrated marriages in Nigeria today.
Yet in the early days of this story, I was abused, harassed, bullied and dismissed as one who could never have a chance to tell this marital story, talk less of a great marriage.
But here I stand with my narrative. I and my husband met in early 2000s in Abuja, and started dating. We loved each other as we still do, but not long after, the devil put to work some of its most wicked agents in forms of friends and family members.
The struggle to put us asunder was so intense that my spouse began to fear for my life. Not only were 'friends' on a daily basis reaching out to my man with lies about me, but they also dug up my past which i had long buried.
But the stench of my past did not offend my God. It only kept Jehovah Ebenezer, the creator of heaven and earth was at work to perfect a union between two broken people.
God did not allow us to do the repair. He descended from heaven, picked the pieces Himself and made us whole.
God turned the 'wise' counsel of the Ahitophels and household enemies to foolishness and delivered them as captives to me.
But it was a painful struggle. Besides battles from those who called me a friend. The most battles came from a family member who should have been like a mother to me and my husband was busy using all available weapons to fight me out my marriage because she believed and was convinced that I was barren so she recruited an army of mean and persistent opponents against my marriage.
Coming from a spiritually-laid lazy background, I initially couldn't weigh the enormity of the wars stacked against me, so I played easy with all that I came across.
The highpoint of our courtship was in 2005, when my man who had done his Masters Degree in Petroleum Engineering at the Robert Gordon University in Aberdeen Scotland, took me to the United Kingdom to stay with him, while we prepared for our marriage.
We came to Nigeria and married in the traditional and Christian ways, where to the Glory of God, a former Governor of Benue State, Dr. Gabriel Suswam served as the Chairman. After the grand ceremony, we returned to the United Kingdom, but not long after, the forces of evil struck!
Our permits were not extended, and we returned to Lagos without jobs. My husband later found a job, but with a pay of a hotel cleaner. It was the beginning of the worst kind of suffering that turned us to beggars!
Sometimes we will beg for food and money and borrow everything from toothpaste to tomato paste. The cup of misery became full and we became subjects of mockery in Lagos and Abuja. How could resourceful graduates turn to beggars at the beginning of their marriage! But it happened.
But great joy came to us in 2009. After four years of a painful and humiliating search for a child, our merciful father in heaven gave us the fruit of the womb. My entire family rejoiced to high heavens!
We named her Olivia, because peace had come to our home.
Before her birthday, the peace in our home, despite the love that existed between I and my husband, was the peace of the graveyard!
In traditional African societies, including Nigeria, a marriage without a child or children is considered a curse and abominable one. So I was treated like a leper and a cursed woman!
After the child was born, the hatred for me by many, simmered, but it was to be short lived.
I also remember that around 2009, we, I and my husband, stayed for a week in Abuja for several weeks trying to see an ex minister of State. This Minister who we had considered a member of the family dribbled us till we ran out of the little money we had and returned to borrowing to feed our little daughter who was about 10months old at that time.
We later, as usual, had to borrow to return to our apartment in Lagos and beg the landlord for grace to pay our rent that was long due before our earlier travel to Abuja.
The marriage returned to misery, strife and great tribulation, I prayed, fasted and cried my tongue and eyes out, until in 2012, Almighty God gave me yet again miracle boy!
The pregnancy, though it brought us great joy, nearly killed me. I was actually dead and resurrected from the dead. It took me several days of hard labour, before the doctors at an Island maternity hospital in Lagos opted for a caesarean operation to deliver me of my God sent son Christopher, who came out as a premature on October 1st, 2012.
Baby Christopher Sonnenter has brought us great joy. With his birth, the demands of tradition have been met and in the past four years God has further silenced our enemies who at first thought I could not have a child.
God has been so faithful, and I and my husband, despite the trials and opposition. We still quarrel over issues, but our love has continued to grow in spite of that.
We have also adopted about two children who are doing well. One is a footballer and the other just finishing secondary school.
Our marriage has not only grown to the envy of our enemies, we now have four children and investments to the glory of Jehovah!
I am using my story to advice young married women to keep faith in God and their spouses no matter how tough the times may be.